'CHELLA 2008

tent making seminar in my backyard, with Lalo

the first major stop.

biggest disappointment since Spiderman 3. you can't put Venom, Gwen Stacy, Sandman, and the

symbiotic suit all in one movie and come out with a coherent story.

i went to The Thing on the drive back too. so two visits. it was the second time that i actually

saw The Thing. they put it in the most ackward spot.

Bed Rock

second major stop.

the first Del Taco in our path and we fucking took it.

Arizona weather is ghastly. my balls dehydrated. it was like shrink wrapping two key limes.

my co-pilot, Alex, who did none of the driving. it was 10.5 hours there, and 11 hours back. no

breaks. just tinkling, gas, and The Thing.

OMG! This was the coolest dinner in a long time.

Alex with the nicer sleeping bag. i got the sniffles soon enough.

DAB in Indio. oy!

The Bird and the Bee. for fans of polka-dots, "fuck" and "dick slaps." Uffie. ft. DJ Medhi. her entourage included three black chaps with Lego belt buckles. hmm. Uffie is going to be my mistress when i grow up. her set was some hot shit. goddamn, what a sexy fuckin' lady!

Kavinsky. i hate to say it but that Frenchman served El Paso bottom shelf liquor compared to

his Coachella performance. he still looked smug by the way. the whole Ed Banger family was in

attendance.

Minus the Bear. stagnant performance. but still keeping true to their early 00's indie rock motif.

Alex and I both agreed these kids were on PCP, LSD, or some other acronym. seconds later they

took out a lot of weed brownies from their bag. i asked to buy one but NO DICE. i hope those

little shits get grounded.

Cold War Men. They were an American scene! a poetic triumph. they played a new song titled, Mexican dogs which was very nice.

Pete, Scooter, Raul, and Russell. yes, they are made up names.

how much do you think these savory Camel's cost at Coachella?

Erol Alkan. Erol gave my brother a golden cigarette after his set. sadly, i wasnt present to take

a picture. i became an Asian tourist during this trip. pictures of everything.

Hot Chip. oh, shit!

Goddamn, nigga.

for fifty minutes i was British. luv them.

Junkie XL, with b-star, Steve Aoki.

Junkie XL is for fans of DJs who wear leather jackets in 100+ weather and do air guitar

during a guitar sample in their set. Aoki is for fans of tacky ensembles worn by a tall asian,

who probably had an overbearing mother in a Californian suburb. but dont quote me.

M.I.A.

my future wife.

i love her.

it was neon heaven on stage when she came on.

the show almost got shut down. too many suitors in the crowd like myself.

but none of them have my witty lovable charm.

fuck yeah!

a sublime installation.

E.T.'s home.

more crazy fucking art.

El Paso, shut up.

its cheaper to get an abortion than to fill up a hybrid in California!

Annuals. check them out.

we then headed next door to check out Dimitri from Paris. but instead we found ourselves in a

Perry Farrell hell-hole. all white attire and a diamond studded tie didnt float my boat of

interest. so then we saw I'm From Barcelona. they really like balloons, and confetti.

DeadMau5

Dimitri From Paris.

Gogol Bordello.

he came out with a bottle of wine and just soaked himself. it was great.

clouds covered the unforgiving sun for most of the show.

fucking awesome time. everyone was dancing. my camera died after this pic.

next, Alex and I embarked on, like, five hours of fuckin' dancing, all in the same stage, back 2 back

Danny Tenaglia - pretty cool

Modeselcktor - three guys from Berlin. the one that looked like Run took out three

bottles of champagne and soaked the crowd.

(i was next to the rail for the duration of the night. front center center)

Simian Mobile Disco - awe. they had a round set up. they moved in a circular motion operating

their many gadgets and lights.

Chromeo - i got my fancy footwork. Michael Jackson passed down the torch to these two sons

of FUCK YEAH!

JUSTICE. THE LAST SET WE SAW. THE BEST MOMENT OF THE TRIP.

THEY REWROTE THE BIBLE FOR ME

IT WAS UNSPEAKABLE, BUT ILL TRY :

"And so it began with Genesis. the endless crowd was a collective of rogue waves bashing

against one another. i was holding on to the rail securing my spot in front. my own private

anchor if you will. oh god, i cant begin to exlpain what a sublime experience it was for me.

all the colors of the rainbow exited my pores. everyone was dancing, everyone was in pain.

the power and electricity ran through everyones body. all our mouths were dry from the

tight squeeze. hair and garb wet like you just came out the pool after a friend through

you in, albeit you said, hey, i have money, and my cell pho--!

Justice was the best thing in Coachella for me."

FIN, motherfuckas